Monday 22 December 2014

Stories from the Jumpseat.

Hi Everyone,

In the new year, I'll be commencing my flying duties again as I have a break from grad school.

This idea has been boiling for some time now and I've decided to blog about it all as soon as I have enough passengers willing to share a bit of their lives with me. Due to the nature of my personality, I've been accustomed to talking with passengers about their upbringing, travels, personal goals, love life and my favorite:

How long have you been happily married? I love seeing happily married couples. Laughing, kissing, still holding hands at age 80.

So watch for these stories in the upcoming year!


Thursday 6 November 2014

The REAL FEAR.

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/in-love-and-war/201404/4-reasons-not-settle-in-relationship


Well, there you have it everyone. Four reasons to never settle for a man who is wrong for you. I hear many stories from many women who are deathly afraid of being alone. 

I'll share with everyone what the real fear is though. 

To all the women out there who fear being single. Take off your earmuffs and listen up: 

The number one fear you should have is the fear of NEVER being able to feel TRUE LOVE again if you settle for the WRONG GUY. It is very scary indeed. Imagine feeling nothing but apathy when you wake up next to your husband everyday. Imagine feeling no excitement or a sense of symbolic closeness when you look at the wedding ring on your finger. 

Want to stop imagining such things and start feeling like you've married the love of your life? Then stop settling for a man who is wrong for you. Don't marry him or agree to a second date. Start looking for someone who you cannot imagine your life with. NOW. 

Friday 31 October 2014

Ask Clara: Submit your questions...

Hi Everyone,

I'm posting to invite those who are interested in  having their questions answered, to submit their questions via this website or my facebook inbox.

There are no monetary benefits to  having this advice/travel blog. I've always wanted to start an advice column of my own and my hope is to reach as many of you as possible who may need insight or assistance. Please feel free to write me about anything, especially issues pertaining to:

1. Relationships
2. Education/Parenting
3. Any questions from adolescents are welcome.

I am a skill development teacher and work as a volunteer crisis counsellor during my days off.  Currently in graduate school specializing in counselling psychology, you can also find me at the library with my nose in the books. :)

Happy Halloween everyone!!!!

Saturday 18 October 2014

Ask Clara: Full Disclosure on a White Plate.

Welcome everyone. This week's second letter comes from Natasha in Minnesota. In a relationship for three years, Natasha wonders if her boyfriend's future plans include her. Is he planning or playing with her? Natasha laid out her expectations again to her boyfriend four days ago and asks him to contact her regarding his thoughts. After saying, "okay, bye", her boyfriend has yet to contact her. 


Thank you Clara.

....it's been really hard for me so far but deep down I know I am doing the right thing. It's like you keep waiting for them to change and it's a lot of broken promises.....

I am a professional. 34 years old. I was with my boyfriend for three years and were living in the same state. I got a good job and moved and the expectation was that he would sell his house and eventually come be with me. All of that was going well. It's only been a month or so that the cracks started to form. For maybe the last 6 months, I have asked him to learn about my culture and religion. Initially he said he would but after repeated promises, he would always have an excuse.  

Other issues are his job..He has a very basic job but does not push himself to do much more than that. I stay with him because the man treats me like gold. Literally would do anything for me and really spoils me rotten. I love how he cares about me. It's just hard. I am losing some respect for him because he does not push himself to have goals and lack motivation. He breaks promises. 

So I laid it on the line. Told him I need my needs met and to stop making empty promises...that was Sunday and so far just silence...not sure even if he comes back now that anything would change. 

I guess I am hoping for a miracle but deep down know that if he cannot even contact me after four days, maybe it's just not going to happen. 


Natasha, 

Congratulations on having the strength to fully disclose your needs and in a way, STANDARDS, to your boyfriend. It sounds like you are aware that by doing so, there is a chance that he may not return due to the fact that he simply does not want what YOU want. 

When a man is in love with a woman, there will be no empty promises and excuses. It sounds like this man is really not interested in making a full commitment to you. If he can't even commit to learning about your religion and culture (which is part of you), what makes you think he would be interested in sharing and building a life with you? 

The other issue concerns his employment. Ambitious and successful women like yourself often pair up with men with similar goal oriented wavelengths. It isn't so much a financial issue as it is a concern regarding emotional compatibility. A man who is unmotivated will not satisfy you and at worse, may cause you to become less motivated as well if you stay with him in the long run. The fact that you have mention his lack of motivation in this letter clearly shows that it is something you are not comfortable with. As the 'breadwinner', would you be comfortable paying him alimony and sharing all your assets if you two were to divorce? 

You mention that he treats you like gold and spoils you rotten. A man who treats his girlfriend like gold will NOT break promises and negate her needs and requirements. I can only imagine that he is spoiling you with material things, by which you can purchase yourself given how financially and professionally successful you are. 

Remember: The goal is to find, marry and have children with the love of your life. Focus on finding a man who shares the same life goals as you. All material things can be purchased later when you BOTH have worked hard to financially afford them. 

You did the most logical and right thing by fully disclosing your requirements to this man. All you can do now is keep staying happy and beautiful and see if he can step up to the plate and fulfill your STANDARDS. 

Good luck Natasha and thanks for trusting me to answer your question! 

Wednesday 15 October 2014

Broken Dates, Broken Excuses. (Ask Clara, overseas edition)

Today, Cristina, from Tuscany writes to me asking this question:

Hi Clara, how are you? I'm confused and I need an advice from you :)

I've known a boy 12 years older than me. I'm 20 and he's 32. He is fascinating and a good looking man...But we chatting from 2 months. I never contact him...He always do.

But when he asks me to go out and I accept, he disappear. And the day after, he try to tell me excuses and justifications. Why he contact me everyday if than, he don't wants to go out with me??!! I'm not a petulant girl. I always have the respect of everyone....But this situation has to finish...How can I do?

Do I just disappear and don't answer at his messages, or should I make a speech about that with him?

Excuse me for my English. And excuse me for the bother : |


Thank you Cristina for trusting me with giving you insight to this issue. 

At any age, when it comes to finding decent men brought up to fulfill their commitments, the most basic gesture is for a man to SHOW UP for a date when plans have been made. 

The fact that he has broken dates repeatedly with "excuses and justifications" means this man will no longer have the pleasure of hearing from you. 

What kind of manners was this guy taught by his mother anyways? 

You mention at the end of your letter that this "situation has to finish". Well, I certainly sense your determination to discontinue letting this guy play you like a yo yo. 

Do what you need to do to ensure he never hears from you again. Block him, stay away from the areas he hangs out in, heck, if you need to move to another area, I'd do that too. 

Keep your standards and dignity high Cristina. 


Saturday 9 August 2014

Question of the Day..."Are you the type of man...."

Good Evening everyone, 

After much pondering and discussion with colleagues, we came up with a question worth some deep thought. Especially for men who have daughters. 

"Are you the type of man that you would want your daughter to marry?" 

Think carefully and honestly. 

Monday 4 August 2014

Straws in Beers (The Old Wellington at Manchester England)

Old Wellington Pub on Urbanspoon

Us three flight attendants visited this bar recently. Here's our experience in photos and words :)

We arrived to a crowd FULL OF MEN and I counted: five females. The outside patio was filled to the brim along with the carpeted inside. The selection of beer was plentiful with Peroni and ales available.

Here are the first two drinks with the two of us drinking with straws:


We took a seat outside:


The three of us had an amazing view of everyone. Lots of men and easy going people.

Here's the three of us (left one making a funny face):


The washroom had no toilet paper though at either stalls. And it was carpeted, LOL:

I heard a girl knock on my stall asking for a toilet roll and thank goodness, I had some in my bag (yes, i carry Charmin's mini roll in case of times like these).

After one beer, we left and on our way out, some gentlemen yelled for us to return. Turning around, we decided to snap a photo of them hollering:


That's it for now! WE LOVED it and will be back soon!

Tuesday 10 June 2014

Maple Twist on Patio

Anny's Dairy Bar on Urbanspoon

Hi everyone :) *Waves* Some say I live in one of the sh!ttiest part of town.

But sh!tty doesn't describe the maple twist I tried two blocks from my apartment during one sunny day this week. Here's what it looks like: 





The cone wasn't too sweet. Patio consisted of rugged carpet and direction faces the shade during late afternoon. Wonderful area to read a newspaper or self help books after work. 

I noticed the cashier address many customers by name so I'm assuming they are frequent customers :) Try it! You won't regret it! 


Wednesday 4 June 2014

The Art of Grapefruit Eating (March 3, 2003)

Hi everyone,

Today's entry dates back to March 3, 2003 during university. Then and now, grapefruit remains my morning fruit of choice. Here's a poem dedicated to it.


The Art of Grapefruit Eating 

Sliced in half
Two sides of healthy glowing roundness
Juicy pulp separated into triangular sections 
Leads me to great temptation
*smiling*, digging for that 'triangle'
Punctured pulp, teeth I tear. 

Sunday 25 May 2014

"Haiku".

Sunday afternoon
Hello! My name is Clara  (say hi!)
Counselling people



Tuesday 22 April 2014

Outback Steakhouse (the strip, Las VEGAS)

Outback Steakhouse on Urbanspoon

Lambchops with brocolli, mash potatoes and a full belly. On our outing to Vegas, we munched at outback after having shopped at Ross. Lets have a look at what was on my plate:


What my boyfriend's plate looked like:



With the exception of the malfunctioning elevator that brought you to the 4th floor of Outback, everything was good. There was a whiff of cheese smell passing through the restaurant at times. Glancing over to nearby tables, this could be attributed to orders of cheese fries.



Cheers!

Monday 3 March 2014

Check out my store on Etsy.




Like it? Check out the etsy store for a few more items :)

Koon Bo: "Are you the one who ordered the Baked Sago Pudding via telephone?"

Koon Bo Restaurant 冠寶美食之家 on Urbanspoon

Yes, we were the ones who ordered the baked sago pudding via telephone prior to arriving at Koon Bo. After squeezing our car into a tight spot, we arrived, switched tables as we were too close to the door and clinked tea cups:



We then ordered the Peking Duck. Crunchy, savory duck skin. Mmmm...LARGE green onions and hoisin sauce. Have a look:


Here's another angle:


Next came the lettuce wraps made from the remainder of the duck. Lettuce was crispy and duck melange with crispy noodles was savory. We were full and then remembered we had 'ordered the baked sago pudding via telephone'.

Lettuce Wraps:


We didn't actually finished the wraps so off we go, taking them home. Tony and I decided to make fried rice with it for Sunday dinner. Here's a panoramic shot of that evening's clientele:



Tony, Rene and I have seen the Sago Puddings coming out of the kitchen and alas, we get ours. Tony says, "Wow, LOOK around. This thing is ordered by tables of 10 Clara! What is that anyways????

Here is the sago pudding:


View from the bowl:

You all should've smelled this thing when it came out of the oven. It was piping hot, sweet and comforting. I think I scalded my throat with this though....


And this fish says, "BYE FOR NOW!"